Project Bambino - Part 3

So after taking a much needed break from the hell that would be life at that time, it was time to to get back on the roller coaster for 2004. I went back to Dr. Looneypants, who again gave me Clomid.

For those of you who have not had the pleasure of this fine, MOOD ALTERING drug- good for you.

I morphed into a hormonal, psychotic, angry B*tch. Which, did not help me when I had to take the lovely pee on a stick that month. It was a good thing that Drew was not there when I took the pregnancy test. Negative pregnancy tests, when thrown against the bathroom wall with the force of a tornado, have quite a rebound. Make sure to duck. So much for Clomid try #2.

So I go back to Dr. Looneypants, who says to try 1 more month. Fine. I take my mega witch costume out of the closet and start poppin' the pills. After going through heartburn, nausea and a public display of psychotic behavior at the George Carlin show, I decided that was it- no more Clomid. Of course, pee on the stick time came around and flying pregnancy tests went through the air.

The day after 5 negative pee tests, I call Dr. Looneypants to schedule an HSG in March 2004, basically to see if the Great Wall of China has been built in my tubes. She sends me for blood work, and I schedule the appointment for the next week, since it has to be done within a certain time frame after Aunt Flow leaves town. I go for my blood work that Saturday just as Aunt Flow decided to come knocking on the uterine door. Tuesday (aka tube blowing day) arrives and my cell rings, as I am getting ready to leave work to go to the test.

Me- "Hello"
Dr. Looneypants Crazy Nurse -"Are your boobs sore?"
Me-"No, but thanks for the concern."
Crazy Nurse-"Did you schedule the HSG?"
Me- "Yes- I am on my way there now"
Crazy Nurse-"You need to cancel- you're pregnant"

Huh?

to be continued...