Don't let PETA find me.....

Remembering Murtle started me thinking about all the other pets that I have had in my life. I really do like animals, I just did not have good luck with pets. I have had lots of luck with Baci, but my husband told me that I gave Baci gender identification issues because I dress him. YES- I DRESS MY CHIHUAHUA-BACK OFF! He gets cold.

Anyway, It all started with Ojo - poodle #1. Dad went for ice cream, brought back the dog. Things went well until we came back one year from vacation and Ojo had turned the house into a flea carnival. Ojo went to a nice family that lived next to my uncle.

Pepe, the horse across the street got loose and ended up on our deck. Scared the crap out of my mother when she opened the door. Then the damn thing bit my pinky finger when I tried to feed it carrots. No one told me about the "palm down" procedure.

Mitzi- poodle #2. Sniff, This was the best dog. However, the neighbor's German Shepard decided that it looked like lunch. I really don't want to get into it.

Buffy- poodle #3 (do you see a trend?). Buffy was a chocolate poodle, and supposedly chocolate poodles are the smartest of them all. The breeder even told us she was paper trained. If we had thought about it, we would have realized that the breeder's entire house was covered in newspaper. Apparently we had SUCKER written all over our face.

My mom took a hiatus from animals at this point.

Then came Bobby.

Bobby was a cross between a gorilla and a goat, with an overbite to match. And he smelled like a rotten dumpster. Bobby lasted 23 hours until my father came home and yelled- "What the hell is that!"

By this time I was living in Bel Air and Drew decided, at the mature age of 25, that he wanted a gerbil. To me, gerbils are rats with fancy names. But, we got one, complete with the little gerbil house, little gerbil wheel, and all the little things that gerbils enjoy. Quigley was NOT a smart gerbil. First, he peed in the wheel than ran in it. Then, while Drew and I were in Jamaica, he chews his way out of his cage. We found him 3 weeks later. He dove to his death in our sump pump.

My brother's ex-girlfriend's domesticated miniature bobcat ends up in my mom's bathroom. Again- not a pretty scene.

Xerox- the free cat I took in for my receptionist. Cute cat until it shed it's ENTIRE EAR in my living room.

I always wondered why no one had us pet sit for them.

And I still haven't told you the story of Sammy the Parrot.........